The question as to why do relationships fail? I personally am not surprised that some relationships do fail. Failure is there in every walk of life and so also in relationships.
Man is a social being and he needs people around him most of the time in his life. So, it is necessary for him to have some kind of bonding with others. I feel that it is very difficult for a person to live all by oneself. One needs to cultivate relationships and maintain them. The question as to why do relationships fail?
I personally am not surprised that some relationships do fail. Failure is there in every walk of life and so also in relationships. When a person is born he/she is already committed to some relationships by way of his/her birth. A child to his parents, grand child, brother/sister, nephew/niece. As a person goes through life it becomes sometimes a difficult task to do the balancing act to maintain all of these relationships. Different circumstances and interactions play different roles in either strengthening or breaking down the relationships. In human society there are always changes and undercurrents , all of which affect a person and his inter personal relationships.
I have seen brilliant relationships go sour between Parents and Children for the flimsiest of reasons. This, after all the world hailing the Parent - Child relationship as the strongest there is! Sibling rivalry has been an age old phenomenon, and with more prosperity and complicated life styles this relationship has taken a major hit. There have been numerous cases of sibling rivalry between the greats of the business world etc: Friendships too have not stood the test of time and we read accounts about how the best of friends have turned the worst of enemies for this or that reason.
The most accepted failed relationship is that of between Mother-in-law and the daughter-in-law. If one were to carefully evaluate, one can easily pin point the causes too. But in spite of all the analysis and brain raking , this is a relationship that is much maligned and accepted world over as one that is bound to fail! I have kept the Husband- Wife or the Man- Woman relationship for the very end, because, it is the most intense and complicated relationship. It is also the most difficult relationship to maintain. It is a pleasure to see couple enjoy each other’s company in spite of being together for a number of years. But , I am sure there is a lot of effort put in by both the partners to maintain such cordial relationship over the years.
If we were to write down the various reasons for the failure of relationships, I would say that Personality clash (ego) and money does play a very important factor, probably the most important role.
When it is a question of one’s ego and as to who is better , there is bound to be a clash of personalities, and in my opinion, greater the ego of a person, greater is the damage to a relationship. I have seen many couple move apart simply because they were not ready to accept their faults and make amends, as they felt they would be looked down by their partners and their apology would be taken as a sign of weakness! Money is another factor that takes a great toll on relationships. If one of the partner is in control of the finances and if the other partner is made to realise the fact constantly, it somehow makes the relationship go sour ! Money is a touchy issue in most relationships.
I have seen many ladies go through a marriage without having any financial freedom, but when they are able to assert themselves at some stage they tend to move on , leaving their dominating partners behind! There is a very wise saying that ‘Speech of yourself ought to be seldom and well chosen’ - but clearly this remains largely in writing only! In most cases we are waiting to rave and rant at the slightest opportunity and go on and on about the misdeeds and shortcomings of the other person and the damage is done. Words can make or mar relationships .
To quote another wise saying ‘Speech is power; speech is to convert, to persuade, to compel. It is to bring another out of his bad sense into good sense’.. Communication is a very powerful tool in relationships and this tool if , used wisely can help in enhancing relationships .
The modern day life is full of pressures and stress. There are all kinds of pressures that makes a person very vulnerable and vary. I feel that this stress has a negative impact on a persons relationships. I see many couple who have been together for 40 or 50 years and notice that most of them had a far simpler life with very limited stress other than the cares and worries, mostly related to children and family. So it is all the more imperative that we work on a relationship for it to succeed. A good communication between partners will infinitely help to a great extent in easing tensions!