Selfish Parents

Some couples separate usually because of a cliché alibi - irreconcilable differences. I find this term nonsense. Differences are not literally meant to be reconciled. If they’re reconciled, then they’re no longer different.

“I can’t stand another day living with you!” yells the husband.

“Neither am I,” the wife yells back. “I can’t believe I married someone like you!”

“Me too!” the husband shouts even louder. His face turns red. Veins puff out of his forehead. His eyes bulge like they were going to come out of its socket.

“I regret the day I met you,” the wife gives out a high pitched shriek.

“Yeah?” he lifts his bag and walks to the door.

“And where are you going Mr. Feeling Macho man…!”

“I can’t take this anymore Ms. Whoever you are!”

“Go to hell…!”

“Well, it’s over….”

The husband slams the door and left furious. The wife cries her heart out. I don’t want to be gender bias, but it’s the wife who easily cries. Tears are even considered a deadly weapon of women. Though with tears, she too feels in control seeing her husband’s exit. As his soon-to-be ex-husband’s back slowly fades in the thin air, so as her hope to have a better life grows clearer.

And where are the children in the scene? Maybe, somewhere behind the door listening to their yelling…

Both feel devastated of the separation. But none of them takes the first step. Their pride brings them to part ways.

Parents who seek for divorce, separation or annulment are selfish! They only think of themselves. They only think of their personal feelings and welfare. Except for those who lift a hand on their wife and children, a father leaving his family is never acceptable (and vice versa).

Couples have issues over a lot of things. The most common ones include infidelity, sexual incapacity or dissatisfaction, and other clash of individual desires. That is part of their being a normal couple and parents. Avoiding these things by separating is a sign of irresponsibility as parents. Providing them with financial support isn’t enough. Being married and having children are not supposed to be always filled with bed-of-roses like what they have on the first few days of the honeymoon phase. They need to endure the trials and work on it. They need to focus not on changing each other, but on how they can live harmoniously despite their differences. They need to think of their children and not only themselves.

The children are the victims of parents’ separation. It may sound like a stereotypical view of family but family values remain the same, regardless of the modernized concept of it. Parents may say that the children will soon understand about the situation, which is true. But the effect of living in a “complicated situation” has its lasting effect on the children. Why do sound like I know about it? No one can understand by heart better than those who experience it himself.