The word marriage sends a particularly devious stinging sensation down the spine of many people, especially Nigerian males who do not have the proverbial silver spoon dangling from their mouth.
The ladies are beautiful, exceptionally endowed with the very attributes that the men want. More than ever the ladies are educated, homely and comely. The days of cold shouldering the eligible 'Toasters' or prospective husbands for flimsy reasons such as educational background and height are over. They know that the men simply won't ask the question and when they do, there is a certainty of getting a yes!
The problem is the men. There is no Job and when there is no means of income responsibility starts to grow horns and no one would ever venture into marriage without counting the cost. When there is a job, the time to trip the lady out for a date becomes the issue. In a country where jobs are scarce especially with the recent economic slump, those who have it cherish it and wouldn't want to toy with it. Of course, the ladies wouldn't like that. How do you love a man when there is no time for you to be together?
While both parties could be battling the balance between living and loving, the potential in-laws from both sides are always screaming for attention. They expect their daughter or son in law to be at their beck and call and find time to show them how appreciative he or she is that they did a good job in providing him or her with such a well packaged bag of liability.
The quest for love and marriage has driven many to Churches where they diagnosed spirits and demons from their ancestors as the cause of their spinsterhood. Fasting and Prayer with the use of a lot of anointing oil and mustard seed would eventually prompt the lady or man to start fishing with faith so that it won't seem as if his or her case is the one that is impossible for God.
Truth is luck is playing a big role in dividing who marries from who does not and many have taken their fate in their own hands by seducing an available man and bearing children for them despite knowing for a fact that such a man is married. Good home training and spoken English does not erase the fact that Marriage is provision of shelter, food, stability, clothing, love and much more than the balance in the bank can afford and no banker would take marriage as a collateral for advancing a loan.
The fact that many Americans are married by the time they finish High school and College make many long for the nuptial cord, sometimes, the woman would have bought the ring and secured the abode while prayerfully waiting for the man to take over to no avail.
The dearth of marriage partners in Nigeria has encouraged many to turn to the internet for love and some of them marry the woman from Europe or America who comes with little cash but less liability. At worst, such partners provide them with a way of escape to the developed countries where they hope to make something better with their lives.
Why am i writing this?
I am supposed to be thinking of marriage to beautiful Nigerian girl, but the pressure from everywhere is making me lose heart. simply because i didn't go to her parents house during the last Christmas and New Year celebrations (I was broke and couldn't afford to buy them anything) i have been subjected to a lot of emotional traumas.
My landlady is waiting for me to return home to pay her the balance of the rent. My bank account is screaming from neglect, food is far from my thoughts for the moment and yet i want to marry soonest.
Will you marry me?