We've all been through our share of relationships, and each of us knows how we're feeling hurt, sad, angry, lost and confused. And as we go through this hard time it's important to note some of the things each woman has a tendency to be guilty of while going through this hard time.
1. Crying through out the day.
1a. What you should be doing instead of crying every time a memory pops in of you and your ex, or every time you feel sad and a sense of loss. You should instead replace this crying with the idea that while some crying is necessary. He doesn't own you or the way you feel. So he certainly should not/does not have that control over you and your feelings (though we all know at the time it sure feels like he does). But he doesn't. You are in control of you. And therefore, you should stop crying and try doing something productive with that energy instead. After all success is your best revenge after a break up.
2. Staring at pictures and other memorabilia after the break up and getting hysterical over it.
2a. What you should be doing instead is thinking of ways to replace that memorabilia. I recently noticed that the background photo of my blackberry was a picture of my ex and me. So instead of allowing myself to cry, I thought fast and I replaced the photo with a llama. It sounds silly, but to me llamas are hilarious and it certainly helped shift that pain to some laughter.
3. Calling/contacting him.
3a. You should never call him. Seriously, just don't do it. Nothing good can come from it. I've no idea what your unique situation is but one thing is for certain. It only makes things harder on you. And if you give him some time and space, 99.9 percent of the time he WILL contact you. If you call him, it will lead to you feeling more sad and heartbroken. And it shows that you are needy and desperate. You don't want him feeling like he's so great that you can't keep your self from contacting him. You certainly don't want to give him that kind of power. Do you? Keep your pride and do not contact him.
4. Feeling sorry for yourself.
4a. You are nobodies victim. Plain and simple. Do not allow yourself to be his.
5. Deliberately going though old keepsake.
5a. Some people might be reading that last one and wondering WTF? But, believe it or not some women do it. The blunt truth of the matter is that it's not going to make him come back and it is going to make you very sad.
6. Eating your feelings.
6a. Some chocolate and ice cream is certainly a good thing after these hard times but you should try your best not to make a habit out of it. You want to show him what he missed, right? But aside from that he's not in control of your body image. And you shouldn't punish yourself that way.
7. Not eating
7a. I understand perfectly well what it's like to be so depressed you can't eat. But as soon as you find the strength, you should eat something. No one should have that power over you.
8. Stewing in your own thoughts and misery
8a. I can't express how important this one is enough! While it feels more convenient to stew in your thoughts. It's not a good thing to do. You should immediately call someone or find a way to keep yourself busy.
9. Being Psychotic toward him
9a. People do this. But please don't you be one of these people. Trust me when I say most girls and guys will agree with you when you share your story about the break up. We know he's an asshole. The last thing you need to do is make an ass out of yourself. Hold on to your pride and dignity. And realize that while this definitely is not a competition he wins when you do that. You don't want that do you? But just for your sake "he's an asshole." How's that feel? Better? It's as simple as that he is an asshole but please don't stoop to his stupid low level.
10. Publicize your feelings on facebook.
10a. While I am going to sound like a big fat hypocrite because I post my blogs all over my facebook to obtain maximum exposure for my articles. I'm in a different situation because I'm not doing it for him I'm doing it so that I make money on my articles. So bam screw him. I don't care. But when you make your status about how sad you are it doesn't make him feel guilty it just makes you annoying and pushes him further away.
While bearing in mind that the aforementioned is with out a doubt easier said then done. It is important to note that a large part of this comes from the strength inside you. And I know you have it. So show it! You are great!